The three words, Dan L’Chaf Zechus, mean “judge according to a scale of merit.” Sometimes, this is very difficult because every day, we judge the world around us by our own perceptions. Our sages taught “judge every man favorably” (Pirke Avos 1:6), and “receive every person with a cheerful countenance” (Pirke Avos 1:15) (Chavos haLavavos, Shaar haKnia 18:8)
A gray, long-eared donkey was sauntering through the royal gardens. Jasmine bushes clinging to the fence released a sweet-smelling fragrance, but the donkey snorted at them angrily.
“Who needs you? You block the view to the other side of the garden!”
Golden marigolds bobbed their flowers cheerfully alongside velvety roses, arranged according to soft shades of pink and red. Tulips raised their aristocratic goblets to get their fill of the pleasant sunshine, while birds dipped inside to taste their delicious nectar.
The irritated donkey trampled down the flower beds while hissing through his ugly yellow teeth, “Why must you stand in my way? Why must you sting me with your prickly thorns!”
Leafy elms spread their protective arms, creating a canopy of lovely green shade for all those who, captivated by the beautiful garden, sank at their feet to rest and daydream.
Only the angry donkey swished its tail in annoyance and said, “Why must you hide the sun, you proud ones as if it belongs to you?”
The donkey continued to roam until it came upon a row of garbage pails in the furthest yard. A thick, disgusting smell filled the air, and pesky green flies buzzed in greeting. The donkey pushed aside the pail cover to reveal piles of rotting vegetables, crying gleefully, “Ah, finally, I’ve discovered a pleasant corner in this big stupid garden!”
Are we not sometimes like that brutish, insensitive donkey when we look only for faults and defects in others, when there are so many fine points about them? Sometimes, we search for the little ugly flies among people who are really fragrant with good deeds and fine characters.
Only donkeys — and fools — search among the rubbish heaps of a royal garden.
When we judge others favorably, the picture is reversed. Then we look for roses and tulips even among the thorns — and often find them.
May all of us find favor with each other and with G-d, and may we merit peace and harmony in our days.
May all your tales end with Shalom (peace)
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Tell it to your children, and let your children tell it to their children, and their children to the next generation. (Joel 1:3)
Rachmiel Tobesman is a motivational speaker and Maggid (spiritual Storyteller). He is available for speaking engagements or storytelling, Click here to contact us
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