You shall seek G-d and you shall find Him, but you must search for Him wholeheartedly” (Deuteronomy 4:29). Even after you have found G-d, you must continue to search for Him wholeheartedly. G-d is infinite, and you should not be so complacent as to think that you have already found Him. Keep searching, because there is so much more (Kotzker Rebbe).
A man who had drifted away from religion came to a holy rabbi and gave him a long list of sins he had committed over the years, and told the holy rabbi that he had hoped by fasting frequently and punishing himself by sleeping on the ground and putting pebbles inside his shoes, he could be forgiven for his terrible deeds. He wondered whether all of his actions were sufficient to attain forgiveness for his sins.
The holy rabbi listened closely and studied the list of sins carefully. Then he remarked, “It appears that you have done a complete job. Truly a complete job.”
The young man was pleased that the rabbi appeared to have approved of his penance. “Then I am forgiven?” he asked.
“Not quite,” the holy rabbi said. “You began by committing sins to ruin your neshamah (soul). Having done that, you then directed your attention toward ruining your body as well. That is a complete job.”
According to many great rabbis, atonement does not require self-torment and punishment. Rather, one should understand the gravity of transgressing the Divine will, appreciate how injurious this is to oneself, and make a concerted effort to refine his character so that he is no longer likely to repeat the improper behavior. Self-punishment can mislead one to think that he has achieved atonement, whereas nothing in his character may have changed.
An old Jewish teaching tells us that “great is repentance: it brings healing to the world.” (Yoma 86a) Let us all hope that we can bring about a healing in the world.
May all your tales end with Shalom (peace)
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